10/01/2009

Woe is Me

Woe is Me

Self pity is a shortcut to the path of destruction.

When times are tough, it is always easy to give in to depression and constantly moan about the woes of life. There are just too many worries to constantly think about: bills to pay, family to care for, and so on. The problems never seem to end. The fact is, they never do end! As you make your journey through life, you will always encounter barriers and hurdles. These are trials that test your strength and improve your will. Rather than simply giving up and crying your frustrations out, you may want to look around you and see that no one is exempt from problems.

Self pity may get you sympathy at first, but if this is a repetitive behavior, don't be surprised if you lose friends along the way. No one wants to be surrounded with sadness, and no one can take a whiner for too long a period. It's very unlikely that you will ever meet a person who never struggles with frustration. This comes with the territory of being human. It is not wrong to be frustrated, but it is how we handle our frustration that counts.

One of the most effective ways to change how you react to negativity is to change how you see it and what you do about it. When you give in to depression, you are basically saying that you don't have it in you to solve the problem. In fact, you are just aggravating the situation. You can yell, curse, and cry, yet the problem still remains unsolved.

On the other hand, a more productive solution would be to view frustrations as a chance for improving your abilities to solve problems. If you get frustrated, try to have an outlet. Go talk to a friend, visit a specialist, or pound your fists into a pillow. You need to let it out and find a way to express your explosive emotions. Don't keep them bottled up inside of you. The thing about self-pity is that if you can't get others to feel sorry for you, you can always just feel sorry for yourself.

Pity parties are always a party of one because no one wants to be on the guest list. Just know that when you catch yourself in this state, you tend to lose perspective. You lose sight of the big picture and will be unable to spot the solution that may just be right under your nose. When you are too caught up in your problems, you'll be too busy to even notice the faintest flicker of hope.

You must find ways to bounce back. Be the victor, not the victim. Make your goal in life focusing on solutions and learning not to quit. Instead of making excuses on your failure, learn to get back up and let your creative juices flow so that you can achieve what you want most - certainly not self pity.


You can Learn to Love Yourself

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